Are You Overdrawn?

No, I am not talking about your bank account.  I am talking about the way other people in your life view you.  Do you feel frustrated about the status of your relationships with your friends and loved ones?  Do you find yourself at odds with the people in your life?  Maybe you are not 'investing properly'.  Maybe you are not making 'emotional deposits'.

What is an emotional deposit?    An emotional bank account is an internal ledger everyone keeps in their head (a score card).  As we interact with people everyday, we are constantly making deposits and withdrawals from everyone's emotional bank account.  When you do or say something nice, you are making a deposit.  When you do or say something that causes them pain or discomfort, you are making a withdrawal.  

If you make more withdrawals than you do deposits, you will become overdrawn in someone's emotional bank account.  This 'overdraft' can become a drain on a relationship or friendship. This drain on the relationship creates frustration for everyone and soon someone in the relationship will say something like:

'you don't care about me' or 
'you don't love me anymore' or
'you only care about yourself'.

And the list can go on and on.

Making an emotional deposit is treating others with respect and dignity.  Its treating others the way you would like to be treated.

If you want an example of making an emotional deposit, check out this
column and just take a guess how big of a deposit I made.

- Joe Freeman